It’s 2025. You just left a job in banking. Your rap album didn’t work out. All of TikTok is telling you to not open a restaurant. It’s not your fault; no one can rhyme “fire” with “desire” like you do. China just invented a robot that can fry rice, and, somewhere along the line, 537 different flavours of premix instant hotpot. Chatgpt writes the songs now. What to do? If you answered laundromat, that is correct. But, if, instead you decide to set up a little enterprise that employs fresh ingredients to cook dishes like a human that has actually experienced love before, then I invite you to the spiritual exercise that is Belum Friday.